“Self-love breeds self-confidence, self-worth, self-respect, self-forgiveness. Do not underestimate its power.“
As a woman, we have the most roles to fulfill. (Don’t get us wrong – we’re not bashing men, we love them and respect them. But right now we’re talking about our rubies – YOU.)
So we owe it to ourselves to be the best we can be and to not only love but to be loved – by ourselves. But how do you begin to grow your self-esteem? You start by recognising that you deserve to be loved. You deserve to love yourself.
It sounds like such a simple thing to do, right?
Think about how far you’ve come, what you have over-come, and how you’ve survived up to this point.
Self-love is a journey that will show you that you are alive and powerful beyond your wildest dreams. Self-love may not happen overnight and you may struggle to break old habits, but the journey of self-love is one worth fighting for because it is ultimately the journey to being the best you.
To start off we want to show you the things you NEED to stop as well as what is possible once you start to self-love.
BAD HABITS YOU NEED TO BREAK
Remember your value doesn’t lie in how your body looks – This is fundamental! So many things in the world want to distract you from this powerful truth. You are valuable because you are you, not because of your body.
Stop comparing yourself to others – The shift of energy alone, will help you feel free. We’re almost raised to be competitive. Get the best grades at school, make the sports team – but it can be dangerous, especially nowadays with social media. Rather, focus on yourself and your journey and remember that everyone has a different path to follow.
Don’t worry about others’ opinions – In that same vein, don’t worry about what society thinks or expects of you. You can’t make everyone happy, so this is a waste of time and will only slow you down on your journey to being the best you. So wear what makes you feel good. If it’s a lot or if it’s a little, wear what makes you feel confident, comfortable, and happy.
Don’t be afraid to let go of toxic people – If there’s someone who is bringing toxicity into your life and they won’t take responsibility for it, that might mean you need to step away from them. Don’t be afraid to do this. It’s liberating and important, even though it may be painful. Protect your energy. It’s not rude or wrong to remove yourself from situations or the company of people who are draining you. Only keep things and/or people that will add value to your life.
Trust yourself to make good decisions for yourself – We so often doubt ourselves and our ability to do what’s right, when most of the time we do know in our hearts what’s best. Remember that your feelings are valid. You’re not losing touch with reality. You know yourself better than anyone else, so be your best advocate.
Take every opportunity life presents or create your own – The timing is never going to be perfect for that next big step in your life. The set up may not be ideal, but that shouldn’t hold you back from reaching to meet your goals and dreams. Instead, seize the moment because it may never come back.
Put yourself first – Don’t feel bad about doing this. Women, especially, can grow accustomed to putting others first. Although there’s a time and a place for this, it shouldn’t be a habit that costs you your mental or emotional well-being. Find the time to decompress. Without decompressing and recharging you can put serious strain on yourself. Whether it’s spending the day in bed or outdoors in nature, find what helps you decompress and dedicate time to this.
See the beauty in the simple things – Try to notice at least one beautiful, small thing around you every single day. Make note of it and be grateful for it. Gratitude not only gives you perspective, it’s essential to help you find joy.
Be kind to yourself – The world is full of harsh words and critique — don’t add yours to the mix. Speak kindly to yourself, and don’t call yourself mean things. Celebrate yourself. You’ve come so far and grown so much. Don’t forget to celebrate yourself, and not only on your birthday!
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU START TO SELF-LOVE
Confidence – If you have no confidence you will always and forever search for your confidence through someone else. This means you won’t feel pretty or beautiful unless someone tells you. You will always be searching for peoples validation, compliments and approval. If you love yourself you will have all the confidence you need. The journey of self-love fuels everything you do. Confidence will take so many forms in your life, none of which will be possible without self-love.
Forgiveness – Having self-love will make it easier for you to forgive others who have hurt you. You realise that it only hurts you to hold a negative grudge inside, because you love & care about yourself, you learn to let go and forgive. You also learn when to let go of relationships that are harming you. It becomes easier to say, “no” because you value your happiness and well being.
Drive & Motivation – When you love yourself, you start doing things because you know you deserve it. You start working on your health because you want the best for yourself. You try new things. You unlock potentials. You know your unlimited potential to create value in the world. You know you can accomplish anything if you set your mind to it. You don’t settle for any less, because you know you are capable so much more.
Easier Failures – Be kind to yourself even when you fail. You know that regardless of the outcome you’ll always have your own back. Just as you would treat a child or loved one you don’t trash yourself for failing but build yourself up with affirmations. You see every failure as an opportunity to grow.
Humble – When you love yourself practice gratitude regularly. You’re grateful for even the smallest of things. You become humbler and recognise that we own nothing. All is a gift and you become profoundly grateful. You have an appreciation for others and want to help them achieve their goals.
Unbroken Promises – When love yourself you keep the promises you made to yourself. You honor your own words, whether that is to take a break, go on a holiday, go to a yoga class, eat more healthily, or go to bed early. You don’t let yourself down because you truly value yourself.
If there is even just one thing you start with today, then start. Use what you have and start now. This is your life, right now. You will never get this moment or feeling back. You owe it to yourself. This is the most important relationship you will ever have in your life. Your loved ones close to you be affected but rather ‘infected’ by your self-love – remember “we rise by lifting others”.
Below is one of our favourite quotes to remind you to self-love every day.
Print this and paste on your bathroom mirror or in your car, screenshot and save as your phone wallpaper – anywhere that you will see every day.